This summer in the Philippines has been unlike any summer I have ever had and even that feels like a gross understatement. I have learned as much in this summer abroad as I probably have in my entire last year at the University of Washington if not more. This is not because the education at UW is not good, its just that this experience in the Philippines went far beyond anything that I could have participated in on campus. I definitely had some expectations for this trip and they were far exceeded. I knew studying abroad would be important but now I really see why CHID strongly encourages students to do so.

Trying to answer the question of what I learned is a very large task. On this trip I learned things on so many different levels in so many different ways that it is hard to even put them into any semblance of a list. I learned things by observing my surroundings, I learned things by the way I reacted to these surroundings, I learned things by the way I interacted with the people of the Philippines, I learned things from the way I interacted with my peers, I learned things from my discussions with these peers, I learned things from the way I was seen in the Philippines, I learned things by filtering all of these experiences through my own mind and others’, and I even learned a little from being in the classroom. All of these different sources and types of education I received on this trip are the reason that a quarter abroad cannot be matched by any class on campus.

From all of these sources I learned a ton about the way America manages to manipulate a country and its people, and learned about American history that I have never even touched on at any point of my education in the states. This trip really opened my eyes to the way the U.S. shelters its youth, and anyone for that matter, from some of the dark truths of our nation's past. Its no secret that our country has engaged in sketchy endeavors, but hearing about some of the really depressing examples while in the land that they were and are committed is a real eye opener and reveals a sad reality. During our trip we learned about the way the education system of the Filipinos has been censored throughout history to cater to the desires of foreign rulers. I realize in reading about these things that we too our censored at home. It is no surprise that many lists of American wars do not even acknowledge the Philippine-American War. After learning about how the education in the Philippines has been manipulated it has really opened my eyes to the fact that our education is controlled at home as well, though for for different reasons. It makes me wish that I was as aware and critical throughout my early education as I am now but I realize that’s not how it works.

My way of thinking about many things has gone through a transformation on this trip. I would not say my thinking has changed so much as it has evolved. I have always been unsatisfied with the way our country operates and have always been frustrated with racism and oppression. I feel that I have always had an undirected bit of anger at the establishment. Going on this trip and diving into the truth about the Philippines’ history with America has helped me to focus this dissatisfaction and has really hit home for me more than any other topic of oppression and corruption ever has. Its crazy to learn about all of these atrocities that our nation has committed, overseas. Its things that simply do not get taught at home in an attempt to salvage a reputation. This made the effect even stronger because it was not just that these were terrible things that were and still are happening, but we are kept from these truths at home! Since I have been home I cannot say that I have actively done anything to act on my dissatisfaction but I have definitely found myself translating things into the context of the Philippines. In the week since I have been home I have definitely found myself finding ways to bring up the situations in the Philippines and its interesting to see reactions. There have not been any negative ones or anything but I realize that I now have a personal attachment to that nation and it just does not translate to others like it does to me. Its kind of how I was before I went on the trip. If someone had come up to me a year ago and told me about how America imposes itself on the Philippines’ economy and keeps it dependent on our imports I would have been like, man that’s shitty. Like I said before I was already disenchanted, but without aim. Now that I am more emotional about it, its a bummer to see people with subdued reactions, but until you get involved with something specific it is definitely harder to care.

My thoughts about racism have changed as well. As with other things I was displeased with, this was an area of lukewarmness, no doubt. Of course I would say that I have never been racist, but I also did not really help that situation. After being in the Philippines and having some discussions with my classmates I realized that I am around a lot of racists and letting it slide or laughing at it out of discomfort is almost as bad. I am not really good at being outspoken but I would like to be. Since I have been back to work naturally people have been talking to me about the Philippines. One person was making jokes about how you can buy women there. I am sure he thought he was being funny but the way he said it really bothered me. I need to learn to react to these sort of things and express my discomfort to not be a part of the problem.

In thinking about how things worked within our group, I think all of us would agree that it could not have been better. We all agreed that our expectations for our group dynamic were far exceeded. I had talked with a couple of my classmates in one of our pre-departure seminars and we talked about how we knew we would all become friends but I do not think any of us expected it to turn out as well as it did. I feel that I became close to some of the people on this trip than I am with some people at home that I consider friends. I feel that if I do not keep in touch with these people it would be a serious waste of a strong bond we forged over these six weeks.

I personally benefited from our dynamic in many ways during this trip. In the beginning of the trip I think that we naturally used each other a place to start since we were out of our comfort zone. Since we were all in a new situation (obviously we were not all new to the Philippines) we were each other’s common ground. I feel that this type of situation is one of the best ways to make friendships. When you are with a bunch of new people in a new place and no one really knows each other, you are somewhat forced to become friends. I think that we all knew this, but none of us realized how well we would hit it off. My eight classmates helped me more than I can even say throughout the trip. They were always supportive, always positive, and always great people to have a dialogue with. No one in the group was ever a downer. Not every person engaged in absolutely every activity but that is to be expected. Nine people cannot always want to do the same things at the same time. But that said I never felt like anyone was being lame during the trip. The only thing I complained about when someone did not want to hang out was how it would be so much more fun if they did because I enjoyed every person’s company so much.

Aside from the benefit of having great company to enjoy all of the fun things we did during trip, they were also an intellectually stimulating crew. Although we were all always down to have a good time, we also had some of the most satisfying conversations I have ever had. There was not anyone in the group that was close minded or ignorant. It was really great to grow and watch my peers grow as well throughout the duration of the trip. During this period of growing it was really great to have people on the same page that you could bounce ideas off of and give feedback to their thoughts. It was cool to have a lot of Filipinos on the trip and share and compare our ideas. I feel that Mariana, Travis, and I having no previous affiliation with the Philippines really benefited from being able to have discussions with the rest of our classmates, and no doubt we all have a much different perspective on things now. I felt that our thoughts and discussion were very real and genuine throughout the trip. There was one instance that particularly stands out to me on trip and it was our first night in Boracay. The other guys and I were out drinking and although we were definitely having a fun night out we still found ourselves in a deep discussion about the state of the Philippines and about capitalism and things we had been learning on the trip. We were laughing saying Third would be so proud of us. But it was really a good feeling. It was great that what we had been learning was sincerely on our minds and we talked about it even when we did not have to, and it happened all throughout the trip.

As far as conflict within the group goes I am pleased to say that there was really none to speak of. Its hard to guess that nine people living in close quarters for six weeks could get along so well but I feel we really did. Naturally the two sisters in the trip had their tiffs but that is to be expected and did not put a damper on the experience. In making decisions on the trip we were really just suckers for each other. It seemed that when an extra curricular activity came up all it took was one person to be down for it for everyone else to join in as well. Everyone was just so excited to be in this new place having new experiences that we were all fairly willing to do just about anything and it made decision making pretty easy.

I think that each and every person in our group brought a very specific and essential vibe to the dynamic of the crew. First off there is John. He is someone who always had something insightful and intelligent to say about things and was sincerely dedicated to and involved with our trip and the learning. Another person who was great to talk to about deeper things and always had good insight was Mimi. I feel that she too was getting a lot out of this trip and it was great to share ideas with her. And of course there was her sister Chris. She definitely was a big part of keeping everyone in good spirits. I cannot think of many times when that girl was not smiling and having a great time, which definitely rubbed off on the rest of us. Angelo was a great person to have as a roommate. I realized during the trip that we have a lot of similar personality traits and I got along well with him. He was a hilarious guy who also had a lot of good things to say when things got more serious. Like me, Mariana was one of the few with no specific attachment to the Philippines. We had this in common so it was good to share our experiences as outsiders so to speak. I feel like I did not talk to her a ton until the latter half of the trip but I am glad we finally did more because she is very smart and laid back and brought good things to the group. Magdalena brought a very good mellow, laid back aspect to the group. She could be quiet but always had something genuinely nice and honest to say when she was part of conversations and I appreciated that. Everyone in the group brought a chillness to the group in someway and Steph was no exception. Whenever the guys wanted to do something fun and new Steph was always down to join. Her level of open-mindedness to engage in new experiences was essential and I know all of the guys valued that. Then of course there was Travis. Right off the bat, whether we liked it or not, we were the two white guys and were inevitably going to share that experience. It was nice to be able to bounce my ideas and experiences off of him as he was naturally having exposure. He was a great peer and I think our common ground helped us to have great dialogues.

I have only been home for a week and I have to admit it has not been the best. I this short week I have had my camera, cartons of cigarettes (from the Philippines), and my hard drive stolen from house during a party full of people I did not know, my car broke down, my car broke down again, and I am running short on funds. I found myself saying "why did I even leave the Philippines!?". But I am starting to take everything in stride and looking at it as a test that is really not the worst. Now that I have seen what things are like in the Philippines I know that I should quit my bitching and realize how good I have it here. I feel that I am now adjusted to home but I do not want to ever let go of what I experience on this trip. I want to keep working on this mini video documentary from the trip and I want to keep in contact with everyone I went through this crazy summer with. This has been the trip of a lifetime.